Saturday, September 9, 2006

All sorts of unnecessary bugs in my head.

It is funny how a little bit of this and that can crowd up your mind. A little bit of stress, a little bit of confusion, a little bit of pressure and a little bit of frustration. Ends up being a swell of burden so heavy that you feel like just throwing your head into your beloved pillow and dream your day away. That's life!

But then, try separating all those 'this n that'. See each of them carefully. You'll realize that sometimes, they're actually quite insignificant stuff when viewed individually. Not insignificant, or should I say, they are actually not as burdening as they seemed to be. If I take one thing at a time, step by step, I am sure I can finish up everything nicely in the end. I am optimistic, as always.

Now the mission is to not let things overwhelm me. When you think back, there were always times when you thought you had it bad rite? But now, aren't we all still doing alright?

Today is my big-bad- GUILTY- day. I got the dress which had been haunting my mind ever since yesterday. It popped up in my mind and stayed there for an average of 15 minutes during these circumstances:
1) Walked past a dress store in Brandon Park
2) Saw the silky PJs at BNT
3) Random thoughts, then 'POP'. There it was.
4) Appeared in my dream.
5) IT just won't let me go.

So I went ahead and bought it. For the coming MUMSU Ball. Which I think is not really such a bad idea. Cos, I actually won't need to buy shoes as it matches well with the heels i brought over and its simplicity is actually a plus point, making mixing and maching easier when it comes to accessories and stuff~ OK, now here is the list of my accomplices who 'supported' and 'encourage' me to get the dress:
1) AMY- top supported
2) Olivia
3) Chitra

..........Ok, it is a short list but they did play a big part in the process!

There's another crossroad in my life. Whether to stay here for the next year or to return. But it all depends on my dad, i guess. But when he asked me what I wanted, part of me wishes to return just for old times' sake, missing my previous lifestyle and all the nice people back there. Another part of me wishes to remain here, realizing i am actually begining to see independence in me, to learn new things, and there is a network of close knit friends that I dread to leave here. But then I decided that thinking won't lead me anywhere! So now I am focusing on..... Going back to Sandakan for my summer holidays and nothing else!

Tomorrow! Off to Box Hill to find sponsorships! One of the major bugs in my head. Feel kinda bad for not being able to contribute. There is this temptation to just not care and hide but then, I am a Capricorn! I just cannot bear to do it. Guess I'll just try my best not embarass myself. Or most importantly, not embarass MUMSU! Then we are planning to go to Richmond for some nice food! But not to worry, my pals, I am still on a diet! Seriously.

When your dreams resemble your reality, is it living your dream or avoiding the reality? I am living in a dream now. I always get people telling me that I am very lucky. Honestly, I guess I am, slightly.....? I have never really met any hardships in life before. I count it as a blessing. But then again, what will happen if this luck of mine runs out someday? I wonder....

Being told you are lucky, is sometimes a bit funny. Does it mean that your capabilities are not solid enough to be recognized by others? Or does it mean that you are given a gift exclusive few others in this whole wide world? I love being lucky and being told that I am lucky. But there are days when it makes me feel a bit sulky to be told that.

Random statements:
I love Trampoline Open Sesame.
And this currently playing song in my blogsite!
And Ouran Host Club is so funny!
Missing shopping sprees in One Utama!
Chatting with WenJi who is only less than 30 steps away from me.
Misses Teru a lot.
Angry at someone 'mean' now!
I wanna sleep now so that I can wake up earlier for piano tomorrow~

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