Monday, October 18, 2010


I am extremely homesick. Today is so grey both as in the weather and the grey areas in life.

Why can't we have everything in life?

Forging your own life in a foreign land vs. being with your family back at home
Building your career vs. building your own family

Two of the many things in life we have to choose one or the other.

I love my life here in Melbourne:
the city, the people, the hot chocolates, the university memories, the culture, the fashion, the Shiro, the tram rides, the crazy weather.

I feel like I am building something here:
my relationship, my circle of friends, my career, my personality, my outlook in life.

However, at the same time - especially this moment when homesickness strikes - I wonder if it is all worth it (oh, my grandma just called :< ):

Time spent away from family, missing the little moments, physical absence.

You might say that keeping in touch through phone, Skype or MSN helps a lot. But, to me, the sense of touch - makes a big difference.

I talk to Ray at least for half an hour every day when he is away for work - we have laughed, fought, gossiped, cried over the phone - but nothing beats the very first moment I see him in person again every time he returns.

As much as technology helps us stay connected, the strongest connection is when there are no wires, internet or satellites involved.

Here I am feeling homesick - pondering whether it is all worth it - knowing being here is what I want - wondering if there is ever a way to get everything I desire.

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