Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Angels among strangers

Time can change a lot. Friendships, relationships, people, personalities, mindsets. Sometimes, the temporal effect is so huge that it becomes scary. As you feel more remote from everything you thought you had.

It is selfish to say that I don't want anything to change. Just for my own sense of security and comfort, I will be suppressing growth in others. But, selfish or not, it is not like it is in my control. So, what more can I do than to accept and move on?

I wish the times when laughter is out of pure happiness, words fill conversations instantaneously, small actions trigger chains of giggles, the mind is of sweet memories, planning trips seem satisfying enough, sadness is healed by a simple smile and security becomes a warmth which envelopes you. Never mind the cold winter wind and the long wait for the bus.

Don't expect things to be easier as you grow up. Knowing this, expecting this, dreading this, totally unprepared for this. Sometimes, I escape into a fantasy world of pure everythings through a movie of pure brotherly love, which never fails to make me tear. An excuse to release some lava from within me. Never allowing myself to burst.

Changes are usually terrible when yet unacceptable. Accept and peace to all.

But this gave me an insight into things as well. Helped me identify the few angels in my life. Gave me countless moments of thorough happiness. Allowed me to feel at peace with myself. Showed me a better side of life.

It is hard to survive in a world where lies are so closely knit to the truth. Despite the surface showing all sorts of kindness you wish to believe in, it is just too painful to doubt of the truth behind and more so, when it just breaks away as an illusion. Yet again, I am not content with holding on to an illusion. But, if this continues, will I end up giving up my faith in the good of people?

This is a dangerous world we are living in. Walking on thin ice, we grasp on to the hands of others, hoping to find one which will never let you go. Along the way, there will be not-meant-for-meetings, cruel encounters, sad partings, destructive relationships, heart-breaking friendstips and cold strangers. But, these are what makes you treasure your angels more.

I believe I do learn out of every wound I am inflicted in my life.
I believe the optimistic child in me is still holding on strong.
I believe it is never too late to live stronger.
I believe there is good times waiting for me.

Cause, I believe in my angels.

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