Friday, August 24, 2007


Everytime around 1-3 pm in the Monash library, I get a very strange feeling. This might feel strange as it is not caused by something I see or hear or whatever it is. Just the feeling. The atmosphere itself is quite different and so is everything else. But somehow, it just reminds me of my Sibuga homeland.

The place where I spent the first 12 or 13 years of my life in, staying with a big family including both my paternal grandparents and some aunts and uncles.

Maybe it is the slight sunlight creeping in from the glass panels.
The sense of tranquility accompanied by the humming of silence.
Small noises here and there.

But all in all, there is just no explaining how this feeling came.

Whenever I think about afternoons in Sibuga, I imagine…

…lying around doing nothing in T-shirts and shorts..
…walking around the mango trees under the blue skies..
…running away from dogs and chasing birds under the sun…
…watching my grandma cook all sorts of dishes..
…catching grasshoppers as pets in a plastic bag…
…badminton or more like badminton-wannabe-s with all sorts of victory stances…
…loads of fruits, sweets and beverages in the fridge..
…TV time everynight with everyone..

It was like a never ending summer vacation.

I miss Sibuga really. Nothing has changed with my grandparents and the place itself.
Although this feeling I have now, is not really Sibuga, I am enjoying it.

I am Sibuga-girl.

And now I am at a very very complex dilemma!

Actually it is not really tht hard after all, there are only two choices:
a) Stay back and concentrate on the mountain of work
b) Be a Sibuga-ian for 2 days and not feel bad abt having my group members rush work for me.

ISnt this a tought choice?
Haha, this is about going to Tawau for a wedding ceremony. Where all my Sibuga-ians (grandma n grandpa) and my aunts and uncles and wahlau, everyone will be!!

But Monash is never kind to me.
I shall make them suffer as well.

I just keel on failing.
Or graduate and be a bad worker while flaunting my degree everywhere.
Quoting SiewChin, "Get the engineering degree and go sell bread while displaying it proudly".

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